my days are shorter and my nights are longer ...

im on the verge of giving up. i need inspiration, i need a positive muse besides smokes and alcohol.

what hurts the most ..

is that all ive wanted to do for a long time is date you. you advertise how lonely you are and how much you want a boyfriend, but when the time comes, you feel uncomfortable and just flee ... i might be wrong, but i don't feel like i could have been that bad of a boyfriend to you at all.

all i hope is that one day you realize that i really would have tried to make you happy.

you and i both know that in the end, ill be there to catch you fall when another breaks your heart.

nice guys will always finish last.

sydney.

is really not doing it for me anymore. i need to leave, get out and wash these rough hands of mine in different waters.

i was never a fan of being in one place for too long and living in sydney for my whole life it isnt doing me any good. i guess the only reason im here is because i dont want to be too far from my family and friends .. i just wonder how everyone would take it if i just dissapeared to a different state for awhile? i dont know, contemplating about doing it for a long time now and i think my strings have snapped and might go ahead with it.

anywhere, here i come!

and i will try ..

got me some new corn rows done by a really close friend named ashley rae. cool girl, been friends for a LONG time now, was great hanging out with her yesterday.

i dont have much to say nowadays, because most of the time i really cannot express what im feeling through these blog things, even though most of the time thats the purpose of this.

but i drew myself the other day, nothing fancy, just took 20 minutes, and it showed how i am and how i feel.

big weekend lined up, thursday we got hot damn like usual, friday we have kivins 19th birthday party which is gonna be so good, saturday we have a dress up party in newcastle! too much fun in one weekend its going to be awesome.

speak then :]

later,

edgil